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Journal

|10/5/18| Morning Coffee Talk

October 5, 2018

I’m sitting here with my coffee this morning, and reflecting back on the week I have had. It hasn’t been that great of a week, to be honest. I’ve had a lot of stress and anxiety, and it has been a challenge to deal with. On Monday I had two exams, a paper, and a presentation to do. I’ve had all sorts of issues with my car. I’m kind of uncertain as to what I’ll be doing out of college. Then there is like a million other little things that just seems to go wrong when I’m already feeling the pressure of these other things, and it just feels like a lot.

College

College is already stressful for many reasons. It’s around the time of mid-terms that many college students feel pretty much dead inside from all the professors trying to cram in exams and papers right before the withdrawal without penalty deadline. All without really caring that they all seem to choose the same day to give exams and have papers due as your other classes, and wondering why students don’t seem to do as well as they assumed they would.

Graduation

I’m supposed to be graduating in December this year, and then I’ll be out in the real world. I honestly am not really excited for this at all. I mean yes, it’ll be nice to not have to balance four or five class loads of work each week, but that’s not that exciting. I kind of touch on this in another blog post where I talk about the last semester of your college experience, and how it’s not as great as you think it is.

Honestly, it may be great for some people, but I’m just not feeling the greatness. I honestly have no idea where I’ll end up after college, and it seems like every job I’ve looked into doesn’t seem right for me. It’s times like those when I make myself worry about if I wasted all this money on a degree that I may not be so passionate about after all.

My Car

There’s not much to say here other than this is the second time in a period of two months that I’ve had problems with my car. The first time my car wouldn’t even crank up. This time it’s cranking up, but it’s taking way too long to do so. Of course I also have the problem where it’s not doing it every time. Sometimes it cranks up right away and sometimes it doesn’t. So far I’ve learned that it only seems to happen when I’m an hour away from my house, and if my car ever decides to stop working it’ll be my luck that it’d be so far away from my house.

Honestly, it’s kind of frustrating to deal with. Because taking it to a mechanic to get the problem fixed only helps if the problem occurs with them. The past couple days, my car has cranked up right over 100 times in my driveway. Of course the 2 times I drove my car out to the grocery store or for a meeting, I get back in my car to drive home and the problem just magically resurfaces. But as soon as I get home to crank it again in my driveway, it’s working perfectly fine.

Story of my life, ha!

It could be worse

I know my problems could be a lot worse, and that I’m lucky to even have a car to drive. My worries about college ending, and not being able to get a stable career are just that. Worries. I’m an anxious person, and worrying irrationally about things is just what I do. It might just be the not so great week I’ve had that makes it all seem worse than it is, but all I can say is that I hope next week is better.

Anna

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